Full circle

Five years ago I embarked on my first ever bouldering trip. Seeking for a form of climbing and being out that I could share with Michelle (vertigo has such a firm grip on her that even belaying petrifies her) I acquired a crashpad and a bouldering topo of the Eifel. So on March 8 2011 I drove us to the basalt blocks of Glees, determined to show the love of my life the magical beauty of climbing rocks. And boy, did I do a good job to put her off...

Happy as a kid I rushed up the hill towards the blocks, as if they might vanish into thin air any moment. I quickly climbed the first 5A I saw, then a 5B, then a 6A. After making quick work of another 6A and a 6A+, I figured that - having been a boulderer for about an hour now - I had grown enough to try something harder. That's when I saw 'Die Eisheiligen'. It was (is) so aesthetically pleasing that it had an immediate irresistible pull. I had no feeling (or respect...) for bouldering grades and jumped on it, imagining I had the arms of Chris Sharma, the fingers of Adam Ondra, the balls of Alex Honold and the grace of Akiyo Noguchi. At 6C+ it was way above my league though and I never got far off the ground. Nevertheless the sloping rock at the landing and a poorly placed crash pad were enough to break my leg in a fall...

Sander vs. 'Die Eisheiligen'...

What was supposed to become an awesome first bouldering trip for the both of us turned into a straight disaster, with Michelle having to help me complete the half hour slippery downhill walk to the car on one leg carrying a heavy crashpad, with her having to drive us home with me moaning in pain at every bumb in the road and still having to convince me that this wasn't good and I had to see a doctor, with her having to deal with the fact I absolutely refused to go to a German hospital and eventually leaving me no choice but to visit the hospital in Enschede when we finally arrived after a long drive, with her waiting there for hours and ultimately bringing me home close to midnight with my leg in a cast. My God, what a hideously Homerical  sentence to describe the horror I put Michelle through on her first climbing experience. Somehow though, five years later, she still supports my climbing and comes with me every once in a while when I go bouldering. What a lovely wife I have.

You may understand that ever since that day I felt I have a bone to pick with Die Eisheiligen. A year after the fall, in spring 2012, my mental scars had healed enough to face it again. And so I drove to Glees, only to arrive in a rain shower and find Die Eisheiligen with a soaking wet top. I haven't even touched it and climbed other, dryer boulders instead. After that, I somehow never made it to Glees anymore. I discovered the bouldering in Ruhrtal instead. With the appeal of being quite a bit closer to home it kept me satisfied throughout 2013 and the first half of 2014. After that my interested shifted towards roped climbing and I barely bouldered at all. Glees and Die Eisheiligen drifted to a desolate part of my memory, but never faded entirely.

Fast forward to May 25, 2016: I'm in my car, dogs and crashpad in the boot, driving to Glees. It's overcast and surprisingly cold for the time of the year. Good for bouldering. It has rained a lot the past week though. Bad for bouldering. I'm not really sure what to expect, but the image of a wet Eisheiligen from 2012 haunts me. Third time's a charm, right?

The forest is much darker and denser than I remember. This shouldn't be a surprise, it's Germany after all. It is also bad news though: the basalt blocks are all in the shade and well sheltered by copious blankets of freshly green spring leafs. A dry breeze has no chance of penetrating here and even if the sun were shining, the rays would never reach the boulders. Note to self: Glees is a winter destination. But now that I'm here anyway I'd better make the most of it. I drop my stuff below a good and dry looking 6A ('Brian Gedächtnis Weg') to warm up. It has big holds, big moves and it's high: all qualities I enjoy in a boulder problem. I've barely left the ground when my foot slips off. Standing on my crashpad again I contemplate what this means: no friction today. Maybe 'high' isn't an enjoyable quality after all today. A second attempt quickly lands me on top of the boulder though. So climbing is possible in these conditions. Buck up, Sander! Humidity is just a lame excuse for a losers' attitude.

Getting used to the conditions on 'Brian Gedächtnis Weg'

I want to know whether Eisheiligen is dry enough today. I've waited long enough for this. It should be only 50 meters away, but the view is consumed by the forest. Time to pack my stuff again and head over there. But when the jungle opens up a bit and I get a first glimps of Die Eisheiligen, Vienna sounds the alarm: the rather tiny base around the block is already occupied by a happy German couple with two dogs and a baby. One of the dogs appears to be half Husky, half Aussie, which is pretty much a guarantee for a strong personality that will collide head on with the attitude of my Aussies. Since I'd rather not find out - especially with a baby in the middle - I retreat. I muster all the patience I can find and tell myself I'll have another chance later today. Plan B: walk to 'Es'. Es is THE boulder in Glees - an absolute Eifel classic - and situated in a more open location, which considerably raises the odds of it being dry. At the grade of 7B/7B+ (it favors the tall) it should be quite a challenge, but possible.

Walking up on Es, the holds look good and the boulder doesn't appear to be very hard at all. I get a firm reality check though when my 'flash attempt' fails at the very first move. The required span is massive, the footholds are slippery and somehow the holds feel quite a bit smaller than they look. The standing start (called 'Esther', graded 6C+) goes down quickly, but the top slopers are damp and lack friction. However scary, it goes though! But the bottom half troubles me. Just when the thought of going back to Die Eisheiligen creeps in (imagine not climbing Die Eisheiligen as a result of spending all my energy on not climbing Es!), the magic of bouldering happens: something clicks and I unexpectedly climb Es from the first move in. Baffled I try to repeat the moves and all of the sudden they feel rather easy.

'Es' quickly coming together

All that remains is doing the first move and repeat what I just did. From feeling impossible to within grasps in just minutes! But the first move turns out to be hard. When I finally do it, my foot slips one move later and I'm off. New attempts all fail. Is this signalling the imminent end of the day or just specific fatigue for this move? I contemplate the implications of both for a while and conclude that either way a break is needed. If my energy for the day is running out though, continuing on Es might cost me Die Eisheiligen. In the case of specific fatigue, a quick ascent of Die Eisheiligen and some walking around might be the perfect break. But if it takes more energy, it deminishes my chances of climbing Es dramatically. Conundrum... Setting ego and grade chasing aside, Die Eisheiligen is what I really desire to climb. Third time's a charm, remember?

And so it is that I walk back to Die Eisheiligen, set up the camera and carefully place the crashpad on the slanting rock that broke my ankle five years ago. As soon as my feet leave the ground I am surprised how powerful this boulder problem feels. I really had no chance five years ago. When I reach for the small crimper below the top, it is smaller than expected. I'll have to work my way up on it and slap for the top that looks uncannily sloping. For an instant I look down. Big mistake. It turns out that due to the overhang of the block I'm not above my pad anymore. Fear of falling cripples me and I climb down to jump on my pad. I repeat this entire process twice before I realize I'll have to move the pad to protect the top. Grudgingly I drag the pad further from the base of the block. The slanted rock grins at me sadistically. This time I know that if I fall, I won't do it there though. So I set off again, climb up to the crimp and slap for the top. It is sloping indeed and very slippery. Knowing I have the pad right where it needs to be now I match the other hand and top out. It's done.

When I go back to Es later, I quickly climb it as well. Finally I can leave Glees and Die Eisheiligen in peace. I've had my revenge. It tastes sweet, so very sweet!